The Seven Tenets of Typical Crap

1. PROVISIONS: If you remember only one thing from the Seven Tenets, it should be that we here at typicalcrap.net live only to provide to you. We, like you, were once nomadic wanderers of the internet desert, searching desperately for some sort of entertainment oasis that would quench our thirst. During our search, we found many fan sites for the band Oasis, but not many sources of entertainment. Because of this, we humbly offer to you typicalcrap.net, which is like an oasis featuring many men with camels, a large hotel with a roller coaster on top, and a free buffet inside.

2. CHALLENGES: The individuals featured on this site find themselves in frequent challenge situations, meaning that one of the individuals will challenge one or more other individuals to do something bizarre, dangerous, entertaining, illegal, or generally impossible. These challenges are then carried out and documented for your electronic enjoyment. This means that you, the friend of typical crap, can expect to sit down for a several course meal each time you return, including intensive weblogs, unsettling pictures, both visible and invisible videos, and a modicum of laughing at another person's comedic misfortunes.

3. DEDICATION: The aforementioned challengers have spent years in training to ensure that they are at least slightly prepared for the most grueling of challenges that are sure to be forthcoming. Some examples include: Spending an entire year wearing shorts, never pants; Eating nothing but peanut butter and frosting for seven straight days; Being forced to remain inside a Home Depot for the 16 hours that it is open without being ejected; Participating in a three man free-for-all boxing match. These, and many other challenges, are mere precursors to the true ordeals that lie ahead, and because of this the challengers have dedicated their entire lives to training for this gauntlet.

4. PARTICIPATION: Due to our mind control powers, you are now thinking, "Peanut butter and frosting? Home Depot? Boxing? These challenges don't sound very difficult." Therein lies the true nature of the beast. Regardless of how brazen the challengers might be, they still have a tendency to go easy on each other when determining what challenges should be completed. This is where you come in. In the back of your mind, you are now thinking, "Gosh, it would be neat if the challengers were forced to lock themselves in a bathroom for a week," or some idea like that. Our mind control techniques are not perfect, so we're not quite sure what challenge you ended up thinking about. However, we were able to force you to engage in an inner monologue using your best impression of Beaver Cleaver, which was pretty funny to us. Finding ourselves off track at this point, we'd like to simply state that whatever you would like to see us do, no matter how ridiculous, you can send in as a challenge to us. We will take these challenges, perform the best ideas, and document the results on this site.

5. ADDICTION: Please, please help us. We need challenges more than food or oxygen. Challenges are the only thing keeping us alive. Please challenge us. Please.

6. CHALLENGES, PART 2, or "Long-term bets": At times, we will describe some long-term "bet" that the individuals of this site have set into motion. For example, one challenger might indicate to another challenger that they feel that a third challenger will clearly be the first to die out of all of the challengers. The other challenger might disagree, and a small wager of sorts will be put on the situation. These bets will be logged secretly in an offline secure area, and as the bets come to their fruition, they will be described in full on the website. These bets might conclude in months, years, or lifetimes, but at some point they will conclude, and someone will be the victor in that particular wager section. As with the main challenges of the site, visitors are welcome to suggest ideas for long-term bets that might bring pleasure to the viewing public.

7. LIFE-CYCLE: In conclusion, the only thing really necessary to know about this site is this cycle of life:

YOUR CHALLENGE IDEAS --> OUR CARRIED OUT CHALLENGES --> YOUR ENJOYMENT OF TYPICAL CRAP.

This, in itself, is everything, and as such, is.